The Dutch Masters

Several years ago I went to a good friend's 25th birthday party. Twenty-five is a big one: you've hit the quarter-century mark, you start to feel old for the first time, you can legally rent a car. My close friend deserved a nice gift from me to celebrate his meaningful milestone. So naturally I proceeded to give him a Dutch Masters bobblehead ashtray I stumbled upon at a gas station on the way to the party.

Photo from imgur.com

I like to give thoughtful gifts.

Well, a little Georgia golf tournament I went to recently has a well known tagline: "A tradition unlike any other: The Masters." Back when I presented my dear friend with his favorite birthday present of all time, I was very proud of myself for coming up with, "A European tradition unlike any other: The Dutch Masters." 

Since I've basically been Mastersbating all week, it has occurred to me that a nice little time-passer is to insert an adjective before "tradition" to come up with some wonderful slogans. A few:

A flatulent tradition unlike any other: The Gasters
A Lenten tradition unlike any other: The Fasters
An out-of-wedlock tradition unlike any other: The Bastards
A the-opposite-of-sex-with-Chris tradition unlike any other: The Lasters
A religious tradition unlike any other: The Pastors
An angsty teenage tradition unlike any other: The Sassters
An emergency-toilet-visit tradition unlike any other: The Blasters
A Fox News tradition unlike any other: The Harassed Hers
An inaccurate tradition unlike any other: The Weather Forecasters
A Chris-trying-to-lift-weights tradition unlike any other: The Disasters

Please feel free to post any gems you think of in the comments.