Several years ago I went to a good friend's 25th birthday party. Twenty-five is a big one: you've hit the quarter-century mark, you start to feel old for the first time, you can legally rent a car. My close friend deserved a nice gift from me to celebrate his meaningful milestone. So naturally I proceeded to give him a Dutch Masters bobblehead ashtray I stumbled upon at a gas station on the way to the party. ![]() Photo from imgur.com I like to give thoughtful gifts. Well, a little Georgia golf tournament I went to recently has a well known tagline: "A tradition unlike any other: The Masters." Back when I presented my dear friend with his favorite birthday present of all time, I was very proud of myself for coming up with, "A European tradition unlike any other: The Dutch Masters." Since I've basically been Mastersbating all week, it has occurred to me that a nice little time-passer is to insert an adjective before "tradition" to come up with some wonderful slogans. A few: A flatulent tradition unlike any other: The Gasters
A Lenten tradition unlike any other: The Fasters An out-of-wedlock tradition unlike any other: The Bastards A the-opposite-of-sex-with-Chris tradition unlike any other: The Lasters A religious tradition unlike any other: The Pastors An angsty teenage tradition unlike any other: The Sassters An emergency-toilet-visit tradition unlike any other: The Blasters A Fox News tradition unlike any other: The Harassed Hers An inaccurate tradition unlike any other: The Weather Forecasters A Chris-trying-to-lift-weights tradition unlike any other: The Disasters Please feel free to post any gems you think of in the comments.
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Chris AbellYou can contact him here. Archives
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